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Eat for your health, the planet, and your values.

Become a Sustainavore!

Eat for your health, the planet, and your values.

It’s Not Your Birthday

I’ve been ruminating on this post for a couple of weeks, and while (ironically) today actually IS my birthday,  it’s likely not yours.

A few weeks ago, I was standing on a softball field watching my 12-year old daughter’s team have a quick break. It was a double header, so some of the moms and kids brought snacks to share. Out came the trays of brownies and cupcakes. I felt powerless. It wasn’t someone’s birthday. It was just a regular Saturday.

I don’t have an issue with folks eating these types of food on special occasions, but we have more than 1/2 of Americans overweight or obese, and nearly 1/2 have diabetes or prediabetes. Type 2 diabetes is expected to increase 54% between now and 2030…

WE HAVE A SERIOUS PROBLEM. 

Sugary foods like candy, cookies, brownies, cupcakes and muffins (which are basically cake, folks) are normalized in American child culture. Lollipops are handed out at my bank. Ice cream and popsicle socials, bake sales, and birthday parties at school only increase our cultural acceptance of the poison. And while I have no problem with the occasional treat, as a dietitian and mother I feel the need to say something.

I see moms baking sugary treats with their kids as an afternoon “bonding” activity. I see my daughter going to a friend’s house and baking junk as their activity. Cupcake culture seems to be particularly prevalent in “girl culture.” I am not seeing boys baking brownies for each other on the baseball field, but it’s completely acceptable for girls to bring a tray of baked goods for their friends to the softball field.

Why do I feel like I’m the only mom who is outraged? 

Parents: it’s not appropriate to bring junk like this to sports games or to school. We’ve got an epidemic of overweight and obese kids who are on their way to type 2 diabetes. Please stop normalizing the eating of junk food. And if you make it at home, that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s better than something in a box. Kids need protein and fat for healthy bodies and brains, not empty carbohydrates in the form of muffins, cookies, brownies, banana bread.

Telling yourself, or our youth that “a little bite won’t hurt” or “everything in moderation” is fine is the wrong message. Our overconsumption of hyper-palatable, ultra-processed foods (that includes junk you bake in your home oven) is incredibly harmful to human health. Our inability to accept that overweight and diabetic people (more than half of our population) should not eat processed carbohydrates is a major issue in our culture.

Again, if it’s your birthday, a holiday, or other special occasion, great. Celebrate! But let’s shift away from eating this stuff on a regular basis, and let’s teach our kids that these foods are not a daily indulgence. What happened to orange slices or apples as a snack?

My kids love PaleoValley meat sticks and Epic snack strips (my son especially loves the salmon one), and Epic jerky bites.  Other ideas include hard boiled eggs, carrots, nuts, seaweed snacks, or some leftover sausages from breakfast. And speaking of breakfast, if you start their day with a high protein and fat breakfast like sausages, eggs and bacon, they’re much less likely to need to snack. Breakfast cereal, pancakes, muffins, bagels and oatmeal are simply going to spike their blood sugar and lead to a  mid-game energy crash. And let’s move away from thinking sports drinks and fruit juices are a good thing.  Kids need water, not more sugar.

But wait, when you restrict foods, aren’t you going to cause an eating disorder? The answer is no, eating disorders are a mental illness and are not caused by eating healthy food. My kids have a really healthy relationship with food. They understand which foods are treats and which foods are better choices for daily living. We eat pretty well when we’re at home and they are free to make their choices when they’re on their own.

For those looking for a great resource to learn more about feeding their kids, check out my friends at Clovis Kids.

Building better bonding sessions: Instead of baking unhealthy food with your kids as your Sunday afternoon activity, here are some suggestions on how to bond without sugar:

How to build a fairy house

How to play capture the flag

How to make a tornado in a jar

How to make a butterfly feeder

How to make a stop action flip book

How to make a recycled tin can windsock

How to make a birdseed ornament

How to build your own board game

How to make sock monster puppets

You get the idea. Ok, rant over. Have a great day.

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18 thoughts on “It’s Not Your Birthday”

  1. Rant on Sister!! Thankfully I’m too old to have this problem and when I was much younger, I was among the guilty as charged. Came to reality after kids were all grown and unfortunately, my daughter is the one who suffers the most.

    As for “a little ___ won’t hurt” or “everything in moderation” — that makes me want to scream. How about telling an alcoholic “everything in moderation” or tell a recovering narcotic addict that “a little hydrocodone won’t hurt”? Who in their right mind would say those things? But no problem pushing processed crap, totally acceptable on all social levels. And saying anything gets you yelled at, or in your case, trolled on the internet.

    Keep up the good fight!

  2. Happy Birthday, Diana! My birthday is tomorrow (October 8 — I’m turning 50), and I won’t be having cake even, not even ON my birthday. I have been as outraged as you when I’ve experienced much the same cavalier attitude towards the dolling out of sugary snacks at every opportunity at my daughters’ schools and other events. My girls are well-trained on how bad sugary snacks are, and know to either consume them in moderation or abstain completely. If we can’t make a dent on this issue at the societal level, then we’re left with our individual efforts to educate and train our kids and the adults who hover over them.

  3. I agree with you and wholeheartedly want this to change. I only wish you had given some reasonable replacements for people who don’t know any better.

  4. Great post! I used t bring slice Orange pieces to my childrens games . The team players really appreciated them…..And how about adding to activities- how to make healthy snacks… like some guacamole, salsa, cauliflower hummus and veggies or healthy chip.

  5. I agree with allll that you’re saying BUT you should give your readers GOOD ideas to bring instead of the mentioned unmentionables. Like maybe cut up oranges? Fruit shishkabobs (Or however you spell that word) ???? fresh apples? Cucumbers in star shoes? Yogurt tubes? Etccc.

    1. Added. I wrote this early in the morning and then went out to spend the day walking on the beach, but had many requests for alternative food ideas, so they’re now included in the post.

  6. Amen! Thanks for saying what I’ve been thinking for some time now. I’m made to be the bad mom/grandma for not baking and giving out sweets. Glad to know I have an ally in the quest for the health of our kids!

  7. So true! When I first removed sweet snacks from the house, my family thought they would die. Then they quickly realized how many options for sweets there were in daily life without having it at the house. It took some time but now they at least understand the difference between what you eat every day versus a special treat. Of course, I could have made a few $ if I charged for every eye roll when I offered fruit as a snack.

  8. Please, please, please keep writing about this! This problem is so prevalent that it is no longer accurate to refer to cupcakes, pastries, and candy as “treats”. In our food landscape, these foods are ubiquitous, and therefore no longer an occasional, “treat” food. I see this crap food all the time at community gatherings, especially at my kids’ gatherings (and for routine events, NOT just celebratory special occasions). I feel like I am swimming upstream (not to mention the social risks of marching left on this issue!) when I make gentle suggestions to reshape the menu/buffet for these events and gatherings. It’s really hard being stuck in the middle of this as a parent! For the record, I have no problem with occasional consumption of these foods, as a true “treat”, but as you’ve pointed out, these treats have morphed into the daily way-of-eating. That’s where the problem lies.

    For example, when my daughter’s crew team competes, it is pretty much an all day event, so the crew families coordinate a food tent for the day, offering breakfast and lunch items for the rowers, and for family members, too. It is a wonderful convenience, and it makes sense to coordinate it as a group effort, however, most of the food offerings are atrocious. Yes, there is some fresh fruit, and maybe one tolerable lunch option, but the tables are overwhelmingly loaded with junky, overly refined foods. Breakfast offerings are primarily sweet baked breads, muffins, and bagels. Bags of candy are put out, right alongside cups of instant ramen noodles. Gatorade to wash it all down. It’s gross, and, frankly, I find it all to be alarming and saddening. I’m so disturbed by it that I even surreptitiously took a photo of the breakfast buffet. I don’t know why. I just wanted to document my sense of alarm, I guess.

    My kids are teens now, so I have been observing this for quite some time, and I have a theory as to why most people don’t see any problem with all of this. Many people believe that junk food is really only a problem if it’s making one fat. I have overheard countless comments over the years noting how “kids can eat this stuff without getting fat”. I think this attitude is predicated on the erroneous belief that excess weight is the only reason to be concerned about the quality of food we feed ourselves or our kids. I live in a town where sports and physical activity are the norm, so, naturally, many of the kids here aren’t necessarily gaining excess weight (just yet) from this steady diet of junk food. I think that’s why many parents are so blase about it. They have no idea that there are a million other health reasons to be concerned about this amount of processed, highly refined food. I honestly think they have no idea that these kids’ insulin sensitivity is being gently eroded with each year of almost daily consumption of Gatorade and cupcakes. They have no idea about the repurcussions of acclimating kids’ palates to highly refined, fast-digesting foods. They don’t realize how critical it is to make whole, real foods the mainstay of kids’ diets. I truly fear that we are only at the beginning of the chronic disease crisis in this country.

    Ok, rant over. And, again, thank you for putting the spotlight on this. Please continue to do so. I think if we can find strength in numbers, then more of us will feel empowered to vocalize our concerns within our communities, and will do more to create change around this problem.

  9. Oatmeal shouldn’t be lumped in there as a sugary breakfast. We make our own every morning and add nuts and unsweetened dried fruit, with a little bit of maple syrup for sweetness. It keeps us fueled until lunch, even on the days when we are doing sports.

    1. I’m actually not a huge fan of an oatmeal breakfast, as it’s super high in carbs and the body doesn’t really see those carbs much differently than toast or cereal. Adding dried fruit and maple makes it even more sugary. If you feel it’s working for you, great, but anyone walking into my office eating oatmeal for breakfast and complaining of weight or blood sugar regulation issues – the first thing I swap is eggs for the oatmeal and it does the trick every time.

  10. I don’t think processed junk food should be called “treat”. A treat is something that is good for you. These “treats” are short term pleasure for long term pain. I agree with the post.

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